Aneurysm

Entry date :29th June 2077

*violent thunder, followed by a torrential downpour.*
You know the works.
Pulling my hoodie over my head I made a beeline with whatever energy I had left in me. To where?  Wherever seemed like a safe enough place for me to not get shot. Like the parking lot of an apartment that looked like a convenient setting for murders to take place. Shady or nothin'.
I picked up my phone as it buzzed, and barked, " YOU ARE NOT GETTING A DIME OF THIS MONEY. NOT. ONE. DIME. UNDERSTOOD? I HAVE KILLED BEFORE. I WILL KILL AGAIN. THAT IS NOT THE ISSUE." I flung it over the compound wall, when another bullet whizzed past me. I scrambled up the stairwell, glancing at my watch. It read 2:36 AM.

I jammed the door shut with some rocks as I made my way to the terrace.
Okay, I feel like I owe you an explanation.
The name's Ank, Saiberp Ank. 6212 days alive, and counting. Now how did I get into this mess?
This lil' big website called Reddit, where I was dealt with a more than unfair hand when I failed to keep up my end of the deal. In my shoddy defense, I didn't know what I was getting into.

Circle back to May of this year when I saw a username of percocets24_7 ping me about having the "stuff", some sort of a cataclysmic, world-changing, discovery and how I wanted to go about with the transaction of a supposed 750,000$. Clueless, I figured it was someone who'd gotten ahold of the wrong person and just shrugged it off.
Image result for cyberpunk 2077

Next thing I know, four people dressed in ultra-hipster clothing desperately trying to fit in with the crowd walk up to me after school asking if I had the stuff. I played along and said that I had it, next thing I know I am handed over a duffel bag of unmarked 100-dollar bills whose source of origin I have no idea about.

I did the only sensible thing anyone would do.
Created an alter ego and moved out of the country( it's really easy if you know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who can get this stuff done-essentially getting yourself smuggled out of the country inside a freighter ship stacked with boxes of premium spices), all while never bothering to deposit all of this dough in a bank, cause well cause I didn't know the cash was unmarked then.
Anyway now I found myself in Bogota, Colombia. Lovely place, really. If only I didn't have wronged criminal-masterminds behind my back. Smooth eh?

While running around in desolate parts of the town, clueless about how they managed to track me, I very obviously created a subreddit to ask for help (of course its still a thing), and now I had allies in the middle of nowhere. God bless the internet, extra hard. The trail I left was super thin owing to the fact that I pretty much made it a point to dress up like Neo from The Matrix wherever I went, plus a dark fedora. They still weren't far away though. I needed to get back home. Fast. I'd already exhausted half the duffel bag's supply. I also had some fun while I was it by leaving some obvious clues at random locations with random onomatopeia in a very recognizable handwriting. "Shriek", "Howl", "Squeal", "Click".

I never did admit that I didn't have the "stuff" that they were talking about, just that I wasn't willing to part with it. Not with the money they gave me, nuh-uh.
I'd decided that the recent close shaves plus freaky phone calls were a little too much of a narrow getaway. In the terrace, I picked up a piece of paper and scribbled down what I had to say.

I snuck out the terrace, made my way out of the sticky situation, and after a summon for help, the next thing I know, I was shipped to terra firma this time on a cargo ship with Cuban cigars. All's well that ends well? eh


"YOU WIN.
THIS IS ALL I HAVE FOUND TO UNRAVELING THE SECRETS OF THE WORLD: LET US DEPART IN PEACE.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=78&v=zBpZTo1dlPM"

















Yes, this is incredibly anti-climactic and filled with numerous plotholes. No, don't tell me. Bouquets and brickbats go to bookings@postmalone.com. 

Comments

  1. "The name's ank,saiberp ank" is the new Bond,james bond
    change my mind

    ReplyDelete
  2. Also saiberp ank
    cyberpunk
    your mind>>>

    ReplyDelete

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